This is not what
she asked for. This is not what she was destined for. This is not
what she was expecting from her life.
Whether she’s a
determined successful girl of western society or a simple girl from
east, there comes a time in life when every girl dreams about getting
married. Sooner or later in their lives, they fancy about meeting their perfect
life partner and spending a PERFECT life with them.
And then, the most
awaited day comes with lots of awaiting dreams and prayers to be heard.
Everything seems as PERFECT as she wished for. Days start passing quickly
and then, all of a sudden, even before she knows, she finds herself all
alone. She finds herself in a situation she never thought about even in her
worst nightmare and gradually, she starts to accept the harsh truth of her life
- she has been divorced!
Divorce - The word
itself is enough to shake a person's heart then imagine how difficult it would
be for those women to accept the fact that the person she loved with all her
heart, for whom she left her home and her family, has left her. How ruthless
that person would be. I am not saying that all divorces and separations take
place just because of men. No, in some cases, women are also as guilty as men.
But I would like to highlight those innocent women who have to suffer from this
lifetime punishment. Unfortunately, these women are in majority. The reasons of
divorce could be anything for example adultery, bad behavior, desertion, mental
instability or mental illness, differences in perceptions, temperaments, educations,
background etc of either partner. Even if not divorced, women have to suffer
from the domestic violence like physical, sexual and mental abuse,
intimidation, stalking and humiliation by husband. The list does not stop here;
she is also constantly tortured by her in laws. She is not allowed to visit her
parents; she is bound to stay at home and ought to do all the house chores
forcefully all by herself. Still these women silently tolerate this torment,
just for the sake of either saving their marital life or for their
children.
Unfortunately,
children are the ones most affected by divorce, in fact, more than their
parents. One of many reasons is that they need both their mother and father
equally in their lives. They love them a lot and are scared to lose any of them
and thus, after separation they have to live with only one of them. They suffer
mentally, emotionally and sometimes physically because of the separation of
their parents. This causes the inferiority complexes in them especially when
they see other children happy with their family.
In many cases the
husband’s family keeps the children. As they know that a mother's weakness is
her children hence, she’s not allowed to meet them. Most husbands, with or
without the custody of his children, remarry other women. No matter how hard
she tries, a step mother can never give the love of a real mother to those
children. On the other hand, it rarely happens that divorced women get
married again and are accepted by her in laws.
What is the future
of these women and their children? The debate on this topic can take days and
even a book can be written on its causes, reasons and results, but the question
remains the same. Why does it have to happen? Sometimes it is a good decision
but most of the time it's not. Why to take such stand and destroy so many lives
when it could be resolved by mutual agreement? There are many campaigns going
on for this cause, which is a good thing. Majority of them are in favor of
women rights. It has now become a story of every second family and
unfortunately it is increasing day by day.
It’s very easy to
say and write on this issue but how far are they implemented in our society is
the point of concern. I really hope that one day people will understand the
true meaning of this pure and spiritual relationship and would respect their
partners as much as they can. Because to make a make relationship work,
compromises are required from the both sides.
